LIFE'S LESSONS

A few years back, I received email from a friend. Included was a list of things learned from the school of life. Later, I began to think of what would have been said if I had written that list, so I made adjustments and additions to my own version and placed that list here. It is neither all inclusive nor complete and while many points are serious, others are lighter in nature. I think it does touch on many of the important points that we all encounter in life. It contains things that many of us have learned but seldom put into words and I plan to add to this list as time goes on.

Some of the things I've learned are...

You can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you'd better really know something.

I've learned you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do.

I've learned it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it when it happens.

I've learned experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

I've learned you can do something in an instant that will give you a heartache for life.

I've learned that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides to everything.

I've learned that it's taking me a very long time to become the person I want to be.

I've learned that going to church doesn't make you a good Christian/Muslem/Jew any more than visiting a garage for an hour once a week makes you a good mechanic.

I've learned that you will keep going long after you think you can't.

I've learned that a brave man is not one who's scared of nothing. The brave man is the one who's so scared of something he's afraid to move, but does it anyway.

I've learned that no matter how we felt when we did it, we're responsible for what we do after it's done.

I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned that while I've become good at reading body language over the years, I am not a mind reader and never will be. If you want me to do or know something, YOU must let ME what it is. So don't drop hints, just say it!

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion eventually fades. When it does, there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned that regardless of the consequences, true heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done.

I've learned that to forgive takes constant practice. I've also learned that while I may be able to forgive, I seldom forget.

I've learned that being a minority usually makes you a victim of nothing except numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, the Latino/Black Music Awards, Black congressional caucus, Gay/Lesbian pride parades and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, a white male only politicians organization, National Heterosexual/Straight Day or Miss White America and see what happens!

I've learned that money is not the root of all evil. However, if it's your yardstick for happiness, you'll seldom measure up.

I've learned that when opportunity knocks, answer the door quickly or it may not come back.

Along with the above, I've also learned that opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

I've learned that the person who kicked you when you were down is often the first to ask you for help with their own problems.

I've learned that sometimes the worst of enemies will become the best of friends. Sadly, the opposite is often true as well.

I've learned you should always mean what you say, but if it means hurting someone unecessarily, it's better to say nothing at all.

I've learned that a self-righteous liberal or conservative who's found a cause can be more dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

I learned how quickly I became sick of political "correctness". I know a lot of black and asian people. Not a single one of them was born in Africa or Asia, so how can they be "African/Asian-Americans"? Besides, Africa and Asia are continents. I don't go around saying I'm a European-American or American-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandparents were from England or had native-american heritage. I am proud to be an AMERICAN, living in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA and nowhere else.

I've learned that sometimes I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned that while I had no choice in picking my family, everyone else was of my own choosing.

I've learned that true love and friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.

I've learned that if you ask a question you don't really want an answer to, don't get upset if you receive an answer you don't really want to hear.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people just won't care back.

I've learned that actions usually do speak louder than words. Still, a few words at the right moment will speak volumes.

I've learned that no matter how good a friend someone is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while.

I've learned that while our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned that guns (or anything else, for that matter) do not make you a killer, KILLING makes you a killer! You can kill someone using a baseball bat, a knife, arson or a car but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ballpark or take away the steak knife and matches you use for your Bar-B-Q while there.

I've learned that while it takes years to build up trust, it only takes seconds to destroy it.

I've learned that I should never take anything for granted. Like Murphys Law, if something can happen, sooner or later it probably will.

I've learned to expect the unexpected. Like Murphys Law mentioned above, if it can happen, it probably will.

I've learned that when we understand and accept that friends change, we don't have to change friends when they do.

I've learned when 70% of people who get arrested are a particular racial/ethnic group, in cities where 70% of the population is also a particular racial/ethnic group, that is NOT profiling - it is the Law of Probability.

I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts the most.

I've learned that you can't make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can & is willing to be loved.

I've learned that no matter how hard you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will also be hurt in the process.

I've learned that those who are honest with themselves about their strengths and their weaknesses, go farther in life and are more content with the outcome.

I've learned that in most situations it's wise to hope for the best but prepare for the worst.

I've learned that when we die, our importance will not be determined by the wealth we leave behind, but by how many will mourn our passing.

I've learned that with age usually comes wisdon and maturity, but age can be a very high price to pay as it sometimes takes a lifetime.

I've learned that you shouldn't be afraid to express yourself or tell someone what they mean to you. If you wait until it's the "right" time, it might be too late.

I've learned that you really are never too old to learn.

Finally, I've learned if you don't like my point of view, tough. You're entitled to your opinion and I'm entitled to mine!

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